my weblog

Didn’t realise I hadn’t posted for about a month :-O!

 So what has been happening with me? Well, teachers have started to build us up for our exams in June, so I have started revising. There is so much to do, as well as coursework. The only glimmer of hope I see is that the exams finish the day before my birthday and we break up for the Easter holidays on Friday.

I have a few bits and bobs planned for Easter. I am going on a pre driver day, as I will be able to start having driving lessons in June. I am also meeting some friends who are coming up from the south of England. Although I will relax at some point, it is mainly for revision as when I get back there’ll be only 4 weeks til exams.

 Bye!

I haven’t written in here for ages Life is so hectic, but I always keep a diary of thoughts locked in my mind. They are often better written than these entries, as my thoughts are often spontaneous.

First off, what is a “post slug”?

Although I am not religious, I have given up chocolate for Lent. What is weird, is that before, I really loved chocolate. I am known for loving chocolate! I used to have a lot. However, since not eating any, I feel happier, more relaxed and more accepting. It is different. Nature inspires me and the short trips on the bus to school in the mornings are the perfect opportunity to just be amazed by nature….it soothes me.

My flute playing isn’t going too well at the moment. I thought I was doing well, I was being praised for my playing, I got 22/25 in a recent assessment, but in my last lesson I got told I was “in a rut”. So my confidence isn’t that high right now, but I am enjoying my playing, nomatter what happens.

I have been feeling quite content for sometime, although my circumstances have not changed. Although a certain person makes me feel so amazing, I don’t feel the pain as much, in the sense, for the moment, things can’t happen between us. The suspense is killing me, but I am enjoying his friendship, and look forward to seeing him at Easter.

Nicki

Well today is the day where all the TV and radio stations make a big deal over love, and couples and stuff. They don’t seem to realise that not everybody has someone they can love…

Well, at last a half term break. At least it is meant to be a break in the sense we have a week off from school. However, teachers just don’t seem to realise that as well as taking their subject we have 3 other subjects that we do. So they all give us piles of work! I mean, I’ll get the little bits done this weekend, and save the ‘juicy’ ones for later in the week so I do have a break, but we’re also expected to start revising for A.S exams which are May/June time.

The Winter Olympics in Turin opened yesterday. As a nation, where snow occurs very seldomly, we’re not expected to do well, although we did win gold in curling in Salt Lake City a few years ago! Plus, at the opening ceremony we looked like we were going to a funeral, all the other nations had bright and colourful attire. I am not complaining though, I love sport, especially watching it.

What will I be doing today? Making a start on Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte. We have to read it all over the holidays. I have read a bit of it before, and I really got into it.

Blog more later,

Nicki x

Wow, my blog dashboard looks different - but that isn’t a bad thing

 I’ve been meaning to blog for ages, but it has never happened, but I have been walking around with a blog forming in my head.

 It comes down to the fact that I don’t really like myself. What happens is I get really stressed and worried for tests and things like that. Then, I feel so out of control, I end up texting people and talking about how I am so worried. Then I hate myself for moaning at them. I just can’t help it, I am so unconfident in myself and my ability. I have been told by various people I am too hard on myself, and everyone knows how much I worry. But when I look at me, all I can do is pick out faults. I then compare myself to others and in comparison I’m just rubbish.

Also, I feel lonely. Not lonely, friends wise, but lonely in the sense that I haven’t got a boyfriend. I’m not desparate for one, the problem is that at Christmas time I had the most amazing time with this fab person, but for several reasons, nothing will happen until I’m older, and I don’t even know whether the feeling is still there. It was just so magical, and such a great feeling but I don’t think anything will happen :(.

Nice to be blogging again though,

Nicki

 PS - Thanks http://turtelina.net/dailylife target=”blank”>Connie for sorting this out

School has meant I am going to have to not post here as frequently, or update as regularly. Although Starberry used to be updated fairly regularly, with some content, pressures of work mean I feel I’ll be no longer able to do this.

I don’t want to abandon the online world, but I definitely won’t be posting as much.

We have snow! Ok, not much, but we have some. It is really pretty, but it is freezing outside and now we have the addition of fog!

Thanks to Connie for putting up this Christmas theme. I know it is after Christmas, but I have a busy few days, so I’ll change it at the weekend.

I got some nice things for Christmas like jewellery and flute stuff, but mostly little bits and bobs.

Have a good day!

Ok, I am sorry there hasn’t been a layout change, but to be perfectly honest, I think it’ll remain like this. I no longer have the time or energy to commit to running a site, although I will blog weekly.

I’d just like to wish everyone a

Very merry and happy Christmas and a peaceful 2006

Nicki

Yay, at last term is over. I finished on Friday. I know I said I’d have a layout up sometime, I really must make one, but we’ll see how this holiday goes. I have 4 essays to write, some other work and revision for some January exams. Plus we’re going away for a few days, and I won’t getmuch time. However, I am getting a laptop this holiday, so when people are on the computer, I could make layouts on my laptop. So, we’ll see, it might work!

Today I am going out to get a couple of last minute presents, for people who have got you something and you haven’t got them anything. It makes me feel so bad. My friends have given me presents, and I am saving them this year. I did last year, but I used to just open them.

I’m playing in a Church tonight. I am not religious, but somebody asked whether I’d play in a service. Hopefully it’ll go well.

Oh dear. I haven’t blogged or done any updating for ages. As usual, I am so busy. I don’t have the time or effort to dedicate to website designing. School has suddenly got so much more important. If I get bad grades this year, it could determine which university I go to. Ok, I haven’t got a clue what I want to study at university but I want to keep my options open.

I am not in the Christmas mood at all. Maybe it is because of all the work, I have had to be motivated for that. I gave out presents and cards, but I don’t seem excited that it is 2 weeks until Christmas TODAY. That seems quite unreal really.

I am looking to buy a laptop - any recommendations?